Qualities or Characteristics of a Good Father
How to be a good father to your Children? How to be a Dad your kids would be proud of? What are the traits or qualities one should develop to become a good father? Given below are the Qualities or Characteristics of a Good Parent.
By Anamika S
- Spend time with your children:Many Guys tend to think that as long as they fulfill the responsibility of providing for the expenses of the kids they are doing a good job as a Parent. There are many Guys who miss opportunities to spend time with their children because they have competing responsibilities or interests. What they fail to understand is that while doing so they are also leaving the opportunity to create an emotional bonding with the child and discipline the kid properly. When you spend time with children you would be able to know their strength or weaknesses and give you’re your help and support to develop as good individuals. Teach your kids what is right and what is wrong. Never be scared to admit when you are wrong and apologize for it. Time and Tides wait for no man. When the opportunity has passed, you cannot get it back. If your son or daughter is not close to you or does not care for you can mean that you did not do a good job of being a Parent.
- Take the Responsibility for your Kids: If you have brought the Children to the world, be prepared to take care of the responsibilities related to the child. A child requires your love and support. The other needs of a child like food, clothing, shelter, medical attention and education also should be taken care of. If you are not willing to take the responsibilities of a parent, it is better not to have a child at all. Show interest in the life of your child by listening to what they have to say and create an atmosphere in which they can come to you and talk to you any problem or difficulty they are having and get the right guidance from you in solving it. Holidaying together, attending school functions, taking them for shopping or eating out and helping them doing homework are all deeds which can score well with kids. It is also your responsibility to teach your children to have good manners and to be respectful citizens.
- Lead by Example when you discipline kids:Be a role model to your child. Be a teacher to your kids by both words and deeds. If you are all “Preach” and “no Practice” your children would not respect you. Children need to be taught right from wrong. If you treat your Parents like garbage do not be surprised if one day your child would treat you the same way too. Also let your child know that it is okay to make mistakes. But it is important to learn from these mistakes and avoid making them over and over again. If you have a bad habit, try to change it. Give up your bad habits if any like gambling, alcohol, smoking and drugs which can influence or affect your child. You may set reasonable boundaries for children but also make sure that you encourage responsibility by giving chores for which they would be rewarded if they do it. Avoid public humiliation if they misbehave in public which can cause them to rebel or feel unloved. It is better to scold them in private for their mistakes. Make sure that you are kind and assertive when you point out that your kids behavior was wrong or inappropriate and never cross them when you set standards for them to follow. Do not force them to do as you say by beating or hurting them.You can be Tough and Firm with your son or daughter Without Being Violent.
- Show Love and Affection: Many men do not show their love and affection to kids in front of them. It may be remembered that children are not mind readers and they normally take things the way they see it. When you do not show your affection to them, they tend to think that they are not loved and that you do not like them. By showing your love and affection to your child and others you are also teaching them to do so. A gentle cuddle, kisses, pat on the shoulder, words of encouragement and appreciation, approval or even a smile can go a long way to boost the confidence of your children. Unfortunately, many kids long for this kind of acceptance and love from their Parents. Let your Child know that you will always love them no matter what and will be there for them. Instill a sense of belonging and security in them by displaying individual and family portraits on the walls of the house and by doing things together. Be a Mentor, Friend and Protector to your Children.
- Parenting Mistakes: Are you holding on to the Parenting Mistakes committed by your Parents and taking your hurt out on your child? That is the worst thing a father can do. Instead learn from the mistakes of your Parents and others and make sure that you do not repeat them too. Avoid favoritism at all costs. Many of us have faced favoritism from our Parents which have left emotional scars in us. Still some of us do the same mistake. Our children mean a world to us. Is it right to make them suffer the way we did? Another common Parenting mistake is doing comparisons of your child with others. Each child is individual and unique. Do not compare the abilities of your children with others or with other siblings. Teach them the importance of sharing and respecting each other for what they are.
- Respect your Parents and Spouse:As I have pointed out earlier, if you do not respect your own Parents do not be surprised if the child is disrespectful to you. What you give is what you get. Many Guys beat up their wives and parents or treat them badly in front of their own children. By doing so you are setting up a bad example for the child to follow. Children are known to mimic the behavior of their Parents. If you are a Drunkard or Wife Beater you surely are not a good example a child should follow. In short, treat others the way you want yourself to be treated. If you want to earn your kids respect, be respectful to your Spouse and your own Parents and do not argue with them in front of the children. It is also important that you respect the privacy of the child as you would want them to respect yours.
- Unreasonable Expectations:Many Fathers tend to have unreasonable and unrealistic expectations from their kids.Many Parents look at achieving the goals they could not accomplish through their kids without considering the child’s desires, capabilities and limitations which is a wrong thing to do. Understand that your child is a different individual and pressurizing them with unreasonable expectations can harm them instead of the other way round. Instead try being a good father by helping your child set achievable and realistic goals based on their personality and interests. Encourage and motivate them into achieving those Goals.
By Anamika S
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